| Saturday, February 18, 2012 |
| 12:00 AM | Everybody Loves Raymond
Episode: Be Nice
Ray and Debra try to be nicer to each other; Ray meets Doug (Kevin James) at Dr. Becker's office |
| 12:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 01:00 AM | Friends
Episode: The One Where Ross Can't Flirt
Ross competes with Chandler for the attentions of a pizza deliverywoman (Kristin Dattilo-Hayward); Joey discovers that his guest-starring role on ''Law & Order'' was cut while watching the show with his proud grandmother |
| 01:30 AM | Swift Justice With Jackie Glass
Judge Glass serves as judge and jury in real-life disputes |
| 02:00 AM | Swift Justice With Jackie Glass
Judge Glass serves as judge and jury in real-life disputes |
| 02:30 AM | The New Adventures of Old Christine
Episode: So You Think You Can Date
Richard joins Christine and her new boyfriend (Tim DeKay) on a dinner date |
| 03:00 AM | That '70s Show
Episode: Jackie's Cheese Squeeze
Jealous of Kelso's career modeling underwear, Jackie seeks solace in the arms of her new manager at the cheese shop |
| 03:30 AM | The New Adventures of Old Christine
Episode: Between a Rock and a Hard Place
Christine tries to get over her breakup with Mr. Harris; Matthew realizes his intimacy issues stem from his co-dependency on his sister |
| 04:00 AM | Friends
Episode: The One With the Baby on the Bus
Joey and Chandler (Matt LeBlanc, Matthew Perry) decide to baby-sit and use Ben as a way to pick up women |
| 04:30 AM | King of the Hill
Episode: Westie Side Story
The Hills feud with their new Laotian neighbors when the families' dogs begin mating. Voices of Mike Judge, Kathy Najimy, Pamela Segall and Brittany Murphy. |
| 05:00 AM | Paid Program |
| 05:30 AM | Ron Hazelton's HouseCalls
Master fix-it mogul Ron Hazelton takes to the road |
| 06:00 AM | Paid Program |
| 06:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 07:00 AM | Live Life and Win!
Episode: Record-Setting Sailor; Mission for Change; Preteen Author
A teen sails around the world; a girl helps suffering people in India; an 11-year-old author |
| 07:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 08:00 AM | Teen Kids News |
| 08:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 09:00 AM | Paid Program |
| 09:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 10:00 AM | Paid Program |
| 10:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 11:00 AM | Paid Program |
| 11:30 AM | Paid Program |
| 12:00 PM | Paid Program |
| 12:30 PM | The Tim McCarver Show
Episode: Phil Niekro
Hall of Fame pitcher Phil Niekro discusses his career |
| 1:00 PM | Jack Frost
A man who died on Christmas Eve returns to his wife and son one year later in the form of a snowman |
| 3:00 PM | House
Episode: Joy
The team takes on the case of a sleepwalking patient experiencing unexplained blackouts; House discovers that Cuddy is planning to adopt a baby that is due in two weeks |
| 4:00 PM | Friends
Episode: The One With the Princess Leia Fantasy
Ross (David Schwimmer) tells Rachel and Chandler (Jennifer Aniston, Matthew Perry) about his fantasy involving a certain royal ``Star Wars'' character |
| 4:30 PM | Friends
Episode: The One Where No One's Ready
In a race against the clock, Ross tries to get the gang dressed and ready for a black-tie benefit at the museum |
| 5:00 PM | The Big Bang Theory
Episode: The Luminous Fish Effect
Getting fired gives Sheldon the opportunity to explore life beyond physics, but when he spends his time weaving ponchos and acting like a shut-in, Leonard calls Sheldon's mother for assistance |
| 5:30 PM | The Big Bang Theory
Episode: The Hamburger Postulate
Leonard, realizing his pursuit of Penny is fruitless, has an unexpected encounter with a fellow scientist (Sara Gilbert) |
| 6:00 PM | The Big Bang Theory
Episode: The Big Bran Hypothesis
Leonard volunteers to sign for a package, hoping to make a good impression on Penny |
| 6:30 PM | Two and a Half Men
Episode: She'll Still Be Dead at Halftime
Charlie rushes to get a half-naked woman out of his bedroom before Chelsea (Jennifer Taylor) arrives |
| 7:00 PM | Two and a Half Men
Episode: The Ocu or the Pado?
When Charlie swears his love to Chelsea (Jennifer Taylor), her response is nothing like what he'd expected |
| 7:30 PM | The Big Bang Theory
Episode: The Fuzzy Boots Corollary
Unhappy to learn that Penny is seeing someone, Leonard summons the courage to ask another woman on a date |
| 8:00 PM | NASCAR Racing: Sprint Cup: Budweiser Shootout
From Daytona International Speedway, Fla |
| 10:00 PM | Eyewitness News at 10 |
| 11:00 PM | Alcatraz
Episode: Guy Hastings
An Alcatraz guard, Guy Hastings, reappears and runs into an old acquaintance |
